This world will never be
What I expected
And if I don't belong
Who would have guessed it
I will not leave alone
Everything that I own
To make you feel like it's not too late
It's never too late...

As a week has passed by I thought that it would be time to, ya know reflect again.

# Breathing kinda became easier, I am not sure if it is a mind thing or not but so far if it is the mind or not it is good as hell.

# Watched Schindler's List and Jaws again, can anyone believe that those two movies both are from the same director?!?

# Listened to the "new" Ryan Adams EP called Follow the Lights...great work but when you dig a little deeper you find out that in the States the single from Easy Tiger, Everybody Knows was released as a kind of EP/Single thing and it was just renamed for the European market. They also re-released Easy Tiger with the whole EP as a bonus disc, sell out? hahahaha

# Counting the days till the 24th of November, Munich, Ryan live here i go...

# Being thankful for the daily Garfield comic which without i just could not live


Copyright - Paws 2007

As day number 3 is almost over it is time for a little recap.

So far I have done pretty well. No innocent people were harmed by me nor was the getting cold and hot at the same time any issue. I think I am moving along just fine, you know running away from the addiction. I mean it works for sometime, I guess it only has to work for a certain amount of time, as long as it takes to stand on my own again, without my thoughts being drawn away because of the thing itself. Addiction is a bitch no matter what addiction we are talking about.



At times I am not sure, if the way right now is the right way, I am wondering and so is my mind because i can totally understand people that were driven all their live by the pure addiction to something, and they gave everything just to die within that obsessed addiction.

As for me, I think you have to make up your own bright future, think it up, believe in it and you eventually get to live it...

Being the kind of human that easily gets caught up with something or falling for it, this is a kind of diary and also a reminder for myself at times when I may decide to go back...


Day One:

The first day was kind of ok. I mean I kind of did not get enough sleep but still was okay that way. Had to get up at about 8:30 and drive to the rink. Hockey practice which kind of took everything out of me. I was almost falling asleep in the showers and I did not quiet understand it but i guess that was just a reaction by the body, you know like not being completely happy with a sort of rehab state.

Anyways in the afternoon I took a walk with my dad, it was almost getting dark but i took some photos n snapshots, I mean after all the most important thing right now is getting fresh air to keep my body motivated for everything.

Now it is close to 9 at night and I am feeling hot and cold all at once, not sure why but I guess there is no need in fighting it...just getting through the night will be fine for the first day, just some sleep...some sleep....sleep...


Picture taken on 2nd November 07, in the Woods, in Viktring

Without Words...



Still no words...

just give some psychos a camera, a car n some concert tickets and there ya go!!!

Stay out super late tonight
picking apples, making pies
put a little something in our lemonade and take it with us
we’re half-awake in a fake empire
we’re half-awake in a fake empire

Tiptoe through our shiny city
with our diamond slippers on
do our gay ballet on ice
bluebirds on our shoulders
we’re half-awake in a fake empire
we’re half-awake in a fake empire

Turn the light out say goodnight
no thinking for a little while
lets not try to figure out everything at once
It’s hard to keep track of you falling through the sky
we’re half-awake in a fake empire
we’re half-awake in a fake empire

Ryan Adams
24th November
Tonhalle, Munich


and guess who is going...that's right - - ->ME

Funerals suck...

so
much
that
I
can
not
even
describe
it
in
words....

So I normally do not go with the trend. When swing music has its season again I could not care less even though everyone buys Sinatra records. When there is a TV Series revival I am not the first to watch the stuff, I used to maybe way back but not anymore...

What I am trying to say is that I am not going with trends so much, every now and then but not because of the trend itself just because I feel like it...and now I have to admit because of Elvis 30th death day celebration I kind of felt the need yesterday to buy an Elvis record although I knew that I already knew all the songs and the bonus concert disc couldn't be much different than what everyone knows bout Elvis...

so it's Me vs. Maradona vs. Elvis...I just have to figure out where the Maradona part kicked in...duh?

Goodbye my friend
You have been with me
And I have been with you till the end

Goodbye my friend
You have been the reason
You changed the season

Goodbye my friend
You deserve the best end
You, my dearest friend...

(Charles "Charly" Zlepnik 15.03.1991 - 01.08.2007)